My honeymoon report on the Jamaica Grande and Couples resorts. August 27th-September 1st, 1995
Jamaica Grande:
We arrived in Montego Bay at approx. noon. Took a while to get through customs, etc. Once on the Jamaica Grande bus, we had to wait approx. 30 minutes for enough people to arrive to leave. We were not crowded in, as the bus had the capacity for about 20, and there were a total of about 8-9 people aboard. The ride to Ocho Rios took a little less than 2 hours, and was an adventure in itself. The scenery was beautiful, but the Jamaican road system that we observed is very sub-standard. Two lanes the entire way, with everything crowding the road in sections. It seems to be a combination road/sidewalk/bazaar. Drivers, including our bus driver, will pass slower vehicles anywhere, especially in the curves. This, combined with the fact that they drive on the left hand side of the road, made some of the passing attempts very un-nerving. Arriving at the Jamaica Grande (JG hereafter), we were simply unloaded and not given any instructions. So we got in line at a part of the front desk, which fortunately turned out to be the correct line. We were assigned a room, and told it was being prepared. They fastened our wristbands (we were on the all-inclusive package), and invited us to have a drink at the bar and someone would come get us. After about 30 minutes, I again went to the desk and asked about our room. We were given key-cards by the harried front desk worker and tried to get our luggage. They insisted on carrying it up. So we went to our room and waited. The room was perfect. It was spotless, and had a beautiful ocean view. After about an hour of waiting for our luggage, we ventured out to purchase film and explore the resort. When we returned we called the front desk and learned that the bell-boys do not have a key to leave the luggage in the room, and our luggage was brought up immediately.
The resort itself is immaculate (at least the parts we saw) and we were very pleased with it. The pool/waterfall/swim-up bar area is very nice, and everything was very well kept. We noticed that there were a LOT of kids in the pool area, and many of them appeared to be local kids that just walked in. Service at the swim-up bar was pretty slow, but the drinks they had were excellent. The beaches (two separated by a coral pier) were very nice, with plenty of chairs available, but the bottom was sandy only out to about 10 feet, were it became pretty rocky. The beach was excellent for laying out or floating on a raft, but swimming would have to be done in the pools. One problem out at the beaches is that locals will come to you on their jet-skis and try to get you to rent them. They will take no for an answer, but this became annoying after a while. Another is that there is a large industial bauxite loading pier sharing the same harbor as the beaches. Not noisy, but clashed with the otherwise gorgeous view. Jet-skis, kayaks,supervised Sunfish sailboats and sailboards are available, and all unmotorized craft are included in the all-inclusive price. Scuba is also available, but I did not check into that so I cannot say what that involves.
Also included is the snorkelling trip out to the reef (a few hundred yards offshore). Everything is provided, and it was very pleasant. Scuba-divers and experienced snorkellers will not be impressed by the reef, as it is mostly dead coral, but my wife loved it because of the large numbers of colorful fish. The guides are very helpful, and will attract the fish to eat out of your hand. We had a lot of fun doing this.
The food at the JG resteraunts was adequate. We were not terrible impressed, but nor were we disappointed. (Bring your own ketchup! Jamaican ketchup is like red syrup, and you get fries with almost everything.) At night, there is a LARGE buffet, were we WERE impressed by the food. It was very spicy, and a wide variety of dishes were available. The nightly bands were also very good.
When the band would quit playing, everyone seemed to go to the Jamaican-Me-Crazy Discotheque. Black walls with wild flourescent drawings with black lights. Very loud, very crazy, and very fun. We didn't stay late most nights, as all this relaxation was very tiring.
But you have to try this at least once.
Things we loved: Things we didn't:
facilities were first rate slow staff
drinks were excellent food was not
Red Stripe Beer phone would ring for no reason
proximity to Ocho Rios persistance of street merchants
Red Strip Beer <G> day trips cost extra
resort had everything we would need resort prices!
CNN and weather channel available $50 deposit for phone use
availability of buses/taxis high fare prices
weeks worth of entertainment, avail 24/7 zillions of kids
Jamaican-Me-Crazy Discotheque couldn't keep cut-off wristbands for
souveniers
Couples:
I had heard a little about Couples, and Tuesday afternoon I rented a scooter to drive down for an escorted tour. The first thing I noticed was that everyone there was on the all-inclusive (that's all they offer) and thus, nobody had to wear a wristband. They were also very strict about only letting paying guests in, but they gladly gave me the tour. I noticed that the resort was VERY nice, but had some signs of wear. The rooms were also not as nice as at the JG. Outside, however, the beach was much wider, and very relaxed. Evidently the beach is clothing optional/topless optional, as there were several women not wearing their tops. The average age seemed to be 20-25, and everything was very laid back, and much quieter. This resort is much more secluded than the JG, and would have been a much better setting for a honeymoon.
We returned the next day and purchased day passes for $40 US each. They were good from 10 am to 6 pm, but we were told by the bartender that we could stay longer, as they have no idea who is there on a day pass. About noon, we ventured out to the nude island, where there were 3 other couples and Miguel, the bartender. Everyone was off to themselves, and would occasionally make trips to the bar to get a drink or some food (evidently, chicken and fries are brought out for us to snack on). Eventually most of the couples gravitated to the pool-bar, and we talked for several hours about anything and everything. Everyone was extremely friendly, and we were very comfortable, even though this was our first experience at a nude beach. The island itself is a couple hundred feet long, and relatively narrow. There is a small castle/tower that contains the restroom and two small upper levels where you can observe the area or get a little privacy. Miguel left for about an hour to take his break, but he told us to help ourselves to anything in the bar, and showed us where everything was. The island closes at 5 pm, so we returned to the mainland and had the outdoor buffet. The staff was very quick and very courteous, and even carried my new wife's plate to our table 5 feet from the end of the buffet line. The food was excellent, and the atmosphere was very pleasant. We stayed late playing volleyball, then hailed a bus to return us to JG.
We liked the quiet atmosphere at Couples so much that we returned the following day, again spending the bulk of our time out on the island. There were a few more people there that day, but some of our friends from the previous day were out again.
We definately enjoyed ourselves at Couples, as the atmosphere was more to our liking. We are planning a return to the resort next summer.
Things we loved: Things we didn't:
No children Far from Ocho Rios
day trips are included (Dunn's River, Inside accomodations a little older
horseback riding, etc...)
privacy of nude island, no gawkers
everyone w/significant other, no "picking up" going on
excellent food at buffet (didn't try resteraunts)
resort had TV room, weight room, ping-pong, raquetball, etc..
plenty to do
relaxed, quiet atmosphere
Red Stripe beer <G>
Both resorts were very nice, but because of the atmosphere at Couples, we liked that one a little better. You cannot lost at either one, as you will not be bored at either. They both provide plenty of entertainment, and you can spend your entire time in the resorts and not spend a dime if you don't want to. Food, drinks, and entertainment are all provided in the all-inclusive plans, and will keep you busy your entire stay.
Our only outside trip was to Dunn's River Falls, and we highly recommend everyone to experience this. Bring your camera, as there are some amazing places to have others take your picture. Our best pictures of the honeymoon were taken by strangers at the Falls.
I hope this helps you decide where to go, and ask that you please e-mail me any comments about this document and your trips to Jamaica. We are also interested in any information about Negril resorts (for couples) that anyone might have. Feel free to distribute this file singly among others. I only ask that you keep it intact and as was originally written. E-Mail for permission to use this file on World-Wide-Web sites and travel compilations/brochures.
